I'm not sure what my opinion of spiritual gift tests is, or how much stock to put in them, but I recently took one. My gift(s) are mercy and service. I pretty much knew that about myself without taking a test. Sometimes, though, I feel like mercy can be more of a burden than a gift.
Tonight was one of those times. I'm an empathetic person, especially with people I know well, and with someone I've known since first grade it just drains me. I look back on our lives and wonder when exactly it was that she chose her path and I chose mine...well I know when I chose mine. I chose my path when I was eight and became a Christian, but I just often wonder what made her chose her path and why wasn't I able to stop it.
I know I don't need to blame myself, and that it's not in my control at all, but it just hurts me to see any of my friends wasting their lives and getting hurt time and time again because they find their value in men and the world. I feel like her heart is hardened to Christianity and I so hope that I'm wrong. I don't know if I've explained well at all what I'm feeling. Maybe someone else understands.
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